Dead Drop Messages

During Doomsayer, Nomi Amersu communicated with Lilikai Singan via a dead drop system they had used during their pre-purge espionage activities. Messages sent and received are archived below,

Nomi, during Doomsayer Session 02
Kissa survives with 6 others. Off planet. Seeks Damasa Kovani. Intel and status report requested. LY2

(Somi Amersu connected to Lilikai through the Force before Nomi received the next message - sensed Lilikai's love for her, an impression of vast pain, and the message "Trust me, I will come for you")

Lilikai (time stamp to be added)
Thank the Force. Status critical. Wounded and sheltering in place. DO NOT APPROACH. Stay far away and vigilant. DK was a Master, left the Order a decade ago. No word from her since, presumed dead. Why are you asking? All my love. Trust me, I will come for you.

Nomi
Warning taken. FM delivered rock to our care at death. Told to find DK. Currently looking for her. Sheltering and not captured? I trust you.

Lilikai
Not captured, but stuck on this planet. Looking for a ship to get me offworld. Too much heat, too much risk to stay. Undecided where to go next. F gave you a rock? That's weird. DK had a lot of strange projects, sometimes got F involved. Wish I knew more. That was a long time ago.

Nomi, during Doomsayer Session 08
Are you still injured? Can we come get you?

The rock is actually a bunch of crystals stuck together. One from Nar Shaddaa. One from Zoph. Know any others? It's some kind of conduit or memory storage thing. Saw a memory of you and DK and F... stealing something? Seems MZA her trainee is also involved.

S is very worried about you. Says you are hurting. Please reach out if you can and let her know you're ok. Love you. N

Lilikai, during Doomsayer Session 09
Don't come get me. It isn't safe. My injuries are almost healed now. When the time is right, the Force will bring us back together. F and I used to help DK hunt for ancient artifacts in wild space. Don't know what they did with them once we had them. Use caution with anything that came from DK. She didn't always look before she leapt. I'll reach out to S. Love to you both.

Nomi, during Brawln and the Case of the Suspicious Scientist
S is worried, but I have convinced her to follow your lead and leave you to get out yourself. But if you need help, please let us know. We have confronted a lot, a planet pick up, even there, would not be the worst.

Just staged a prison break. The Empire is rounding up Force users and sending them to a place called the Citadel. Do you know of it? Where it is? We are all fine.

Went to a place where DK had gotten a crystal to put in the thing F gave us. Trying to find out more about DK and maybe ZA, the one who disappeared a year ago. S and others are there doing this.

I am on another planet following after a loose end. The trees and plants here are amazing!

Also I am learning to understand a Wookiee.

Love, N

Lilikai
I've been to the Citadel. It's on Lola Sayu. Built in the Old Republic as a prison to house fallen Jedi. The enemy took it over during the war and we won it back. Huge mess, a master and many troops died. I was there later to mop up. Very dangerous place. Do NOT try to go there without backup. That's an order.

I'm glad you can be in nature and find joy in it, even now. There's a vine here, growing past my window, putting out blossoms even though there's barely any light. I noticed it and thought of you.

Nomi
We aren't going there now, but have reason to believe a dear friend is there. What back up is there anymore? You and the bully SO/MQ are the only ones I know of who survived.

Can you tell me anything else about it? I am default Captain so they may listen to me about needing to avoid the place if I can tell them why it's so dangerous.

I feel old, like I have a lot of kids to look after. I worry about my friend all the time and if I am putting them in danger. All I want to do is be a girl who gets to have crushes on boys and read sappy holos and dream about what I want to be when I grow up.

Lilikai
The approach is unforgiving. Surrounded by lava, all entrances ray shielded, extensive security coverage. All interior spaces virtually identical, maze-like. Droids once used as guards, maybe not anymore. The faction holding it now will likely have made changes. Any attempt to breach it would need to be surgical and precise. Identify and locate objective, get in, get out, run. Previous missions there went wrong when people didn't stick to that plan.

I want to make a galaxy where you can be the girl you want to be. I'm not giving up on it yet. You shouldn't either.

I know you can't always control what others choose to do. So if you must act to protect your friends - I'll be your backup. Just say the word.

Nomi, after Doomsayer Session 13
We are going to the Citadel. S is trying to reach you to tell you to meet us at Hapes Consortium. Can you get off-planet and come?

I didn't tell them where it is, my crew is resourceful and capable. If you can not come I will need to know as much as you can tell me to get them all safely through it.

I am not a Jedi, but I need to know how to not form attachments can you teach me?

Love, N

(First Sister reveal happened here)

Nomi, during Doomsayer Session 20
Dear L,

I miss you. You know everything about me, like no one else does. And I feel I am coming to understand you more. You would be proud; I have not cried. (Note: lack of falling water is code for an area or contact being secure and uncompromised) I wish I knew how you are doing.

I feel I am coming to understand better. I am sorry I was not there for you as you were for me.

She told you hurtful things and I think it is this: where you are now. It is unfortunate that you never spoke again as perhaps she could have told you of what might happen after, how you would use this to help those people and things you love. I still believe you will.

Please, tell me what is a (the) 1st Sister so that your mission as given by them, is clear to me.

Yours in love and allegiance,

N

Lilikai (received by Nomi during Doomsayer Session 22)
It is a relief to hear from you. Is your sister well? Please tell her I'm sorry that I hurt her. The lightsaber sequence I began is one we practiced many times. I assumed she would parry and we would begin our conversation as part of the lesson, as master and student, as we once did. I misjudged the situation. I was wrong.

I'm not sure you really do understand what's happening here. The choice I was given was clear then, and is clearer now: sacrifice to preserve the things that matter. As others make the same choice I did, I may gain more siblings. But for now, I am the first.

I only want to help you all. I wish you would let me.

Nomi, during session 22
I can not speak of my sister. The bond you once shared has been strained to breaking by the choices you have made.

If I do not understand, then you need to tell me so that I can. But this will not be as a master teaches a student. I am not your student anymore. What I want to be is your friend. What I believe I am is your equal.

One can be given choices and make them to survive. One can then make their own choices and forge a new path. I will remind you of something that you told me over and over: never get so lost in the cover story that you forget who you really are. I know that even while portraying what someone else needs to see, you can make better choices. I will not mince words: I fully expect that you will return to the light. If you do not wish to be a Jedi, that is your prerogative. There may no longer be such a thing. Even so, you are a life giver and a helper, not a taker and a destroyer. Remember yourself. If your fall was inevitable, so shall this be.

I want to help you. I hope that you will let me.

I love you.

(Nomi became Force-sensitive here)

Lilikai, during Doomsayer Session 27
You're right - I'm not your teacher anymore. I know that you and your sister are grown now, in so many ways. You have the right to choose differently than I do, and to make your own mistakes. But my responsibility to you isn't over. When things go wrong, I will still be there to cushion that fall - because you'll always be my children.

When I chose my path, I knew it would be difficult. It will involve sacrifice and pain. Innocents will be hurt. I myself will be hurt. The decisions I've made cost me my heart. I expect that at times you will hate me for what I've done. But the future I saw for you if I made another choice is worse than the path I'm on. And there is no bargain I wouldn't make to keep you both safe.

Nomi, during session 27
It's true. I do not know what you are doing while you are not nearby. I suspect that you are the source of the death of one of my friends from the old network, however, and I don't like those implications. I also know you are the cause of an Empire presence at the old mine on Zoph. Neither of these things make me safer. It would be better if you got that presence off of Zoph. It would go a ways to making me believe you are doing this for us.

You do realize that if the Empire catches me, my sister or allies, we will die, right? These things don't make me hate you so much as doubt you. I have never felt doubt in you before - even when you had me do the most inexplicable things.

Tell me about the future that you saw. I have become very familiar with the ways that people see and tell the future through the Force. Was it a vision? I appreciate that you want to keep us safe, but I also know that there is never just one path to an end and perhaps there is a forking that we can meet on again.

Tell me about the Force. I know you feel I will not understand, as I do not have the training and ability to wield it like you, but for a moment, pretend that I do. What draws you on the path that you have taken besides the need to protect S and I? What makes you feel that that path is the only way and that the Force you wield now provides the right power to do so?

Wishing you peace, N

Lilikai (received by Nomi during Doomsayer Session 29, after she interrogated Seth Iscandar)
I understand it may appear that my actions have put you and your friends in greater danger. But you'd be in danger no matter what, in a galaxy like the one we've been handed now, and I'm doing my best to keep you from the worst of it. I could have told the Empire you were still alive after the Citadel, but I didn't. As long as they know I'm the one taking care of you, there's less risk that harm will come to you. But we both know that with things the way they are now, I can't protect you all the time. I would still like to have that chance - which is why I can't give up.

I didn't see a vision of the future. I only saw things as they are. The path I follow now is the one of least resistance - for you and your sister, for me, for all of us. If I put my faith in power, if I tried to impose my will upon what is already on its way, my actions would be pointless and doomed to failure. A Jedi can do many things, but she cannot stop a planet in its orbit or hold back a rising tide. Annihilation is coming for us all. This is the only truth.

Nomi, responding after session 29
We are safe.

I have heard much of the Annihilating Force lately. It is true, there is power in destruction, but if you step back, Annihilation is ultimately nothing. Those who use the power of Annihilation doom themselves and other things to nothing. And once they are nothing there is no power. The Nothing will not consume the Force. Life and Force once came from nothing and it will again. At the moment of ultimate judgement Life, growth is everything. Life and growth even has power over destruction as to make way for new life destruction is necessary. Annihilation may look like the end, it is not.

I have never known you to choose the path of least resistance.

Thank you for not telling the Emperor we survived the destruction of the Citadel.

What are you doing with Tia Ba?

What leverage does your master have over you?

Even those with power can have peace,

N

Lilikai, during Doomsayer Session 31
You are talking about change that happens on a galactic time scale. It may well be that eons from now, the Force will arise again out of the ashes of annihilation. But you and I and your sister won't be around to see it. Our spirits will return to the Cosmic Force and we won't know anything about how it all played out after we were gone. I suppose this is a comforting thought, in its way. But the process of rejoining the Cosmic Force can be as easy or as painful as you like. It may not matter to you in the grand scheme, but while it is happening to you I promise it will matter very much.

Do you truly understand what can happen to you - what can be done to you by the men in power? I know it intimately, with every beat of my heart. This kind of suffering is what I'm trying to protect you from. I wasn't strong enough to do that before. I got backed into a corner and I'm trying to find a way out. Even here I have to be careful what I say and how much I say it - my master's senses are far-reaching, when he chooses to allow them to be. Stop asking questions like the ones you're asking. This will allow the leverage to be removed.

Nomi, written but not sent
Dear Mom,

I have never called you that, but I have wanted to many times in my life. If you get to call me your daughter, I get to call you Mom.

There were so many things I should have said and done when I saw you on Zoph, but my indecision and fear of saying the wrong thing kept me from doing or saying anything. What a stupid way to act.

I should have told you that I love you. No matter what you say or do, I will always love you and I will always believe in you because I know you are good. You said he (whoever he is) did something to your heart. He has hurt you so much and that pains me. But I want you to know that I too have part of your heart, and I will keep that part safe. You can never lose that part as long as it is with me.

I should have hugged you. Next time I see you, I will do so, no matter what.

I should have told you that even though I don't approve of your methods, I am proud of you for doing what you think is the right thing and I appreciate you that you have been working to protect me, Somi and our friends.

I should have told you that I understand that sometimes it feels like violence and removal of the threat is the only answer. And that I acknowledge that in some situations it has become the only answer.

The only solace I can take is in my sudden certainty that I will see you again and perhaps I will be brave enough to say some of these things and will figure out how I can protect you too.

I love you.

Forever your daughter.

Nomi

(More time stamps to be added after Beth does some plot notes archaeology)